How can I be less angry / upset?
Having a minority orientation can be upsetting for a number of reasons. Anger and sadness are perfectly natural responses to your situation: we all have trouble understanding each other and extra barriers don't help. That said, attaining happiness in the long run involves finding ways to achieve acceptance of the things in life that you cannot change. That doesn't mean giving up on improving your life of course, but being mindful of the things you have – rather than the things you don't – is a healthier way to approach things.
There's no magic cure to feeling a certain way but you may find the following practical steps useful.
- Meditation/mindfulness. Meditation isn't pseudoscience, it's just training to make you more present in the moment and compassionate towards yourself. You can find free guided meditation courses online. A growing body of evidence from psychology suggests that such techniques have a positive and sometimes profound impact on well-being.
- Write down three things you're grateful for each day. This is super simple and has been shown to have a significant impact in subjective well-being.
- Have compassion for everyone – including yourself. Compassion is a habit. The more you do it the easier it becomes, but don't blame yourself if you struggle. Sometimes life is hard, and unfair, and it hurts. That's ok. Don't judge that feeling: there's no such thing as a wrong feeling.
- Reach out to asexuality communities, online or otherwise. Most such groups are very welcoming and they will be able to understand the things you are going through. Taking about your struggles will help you better understand and come to terms with them.