Am I aromantic?

Just as with asexuality, it can be difficult to know if you are aromantic or not because, if you are aromantic, it requires you to pin down a feeling that you don't personally experience. But even on top of that, for most people it's much harder to pin down whether they are aromantic compared to whether they are asexual. This is because romanticism is a significantly more nebulous concept than sexual attraction. However – again, just as with asexuality – just because you might not be able to come up with a definite, satisfying answer doesn't mean you've wasted your time thinking about it. At the end of the day, the aromanticism movement is about recognising what each of us really wants out of the relationships in our lives and feeling like we can pursue that without being obligated to act in a certain way because of whatever preconceived notions about romanticism.

An aromantic is someone who doesn't feel romantic attraction. You can read The a-spectra for a description of what romantic attraction is. Romantic attraction often interacts and overlaps with many other kinds of attraction, including sexual attraction (for allosexuals), aesthetic attraction, sensual attraction, platonic attraction, and so on. However, romantic attraction is not in itself any of these particular kinds of attraction. In other words, all of the following are compatible with aromanticim.

If you think you may be aromantic you may want to read Experiences, which has first-hand descriptions of what romanticism feels like.

If you only experience romantic attraction rarely or under specific circumstances, then you may be grey-aromantic. You may wish to consult Grey-asexuality. Though the page is written primarily in respect of allosexuality / asexuality, many if not all of the concepts can be simply translated to alloromanticism / aromanticism.

Common experiences

Just like asexuality, there are some common experiences that may indicate you are aromantic which you can read below. Of course, these experiences are not universal and shouldn't be used as strict criteria, but they can help build up a picture of what it might be like to be aromantic.

Perhaps you have felt one of the following.

Perhaps the actions of others have seemed strange to you in one of the following ways.

Perhaps you've been mistaken in one of the following ways.